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I Stayed With My Narcissistic Husband For 30 Years

I stayed 30 years. I believed all the lies in your book, 20 Lies That Keep You With Your Abuser. I left in 2010. I am grateful to be alone and free. My children were damaged from living with domestic violence. I had no support to leave. My husband threatened, if I left him, then he would take the children. I would never see them. He would teach them to hate me. He taught our 2 year old son his first sentence, "Kick mommy's a**." He would laugh whenever my son hit me, kicked me or spit on me. he would tell my son, "Your mother is an a**hole. She does not love you. Go hit her." My husband served in children's ministry at church. Church people would come up to me and tell me I have a wonderful husband. I asked for help at church but no one believe me. My husband would tell me to my face that he was punishing me because I was not submissive. If I said no to sex, he threw my contacts in the toilet. I felt guilty to leave me marriage. It took me 30 years to walk out of my marriage and to leave the church. Churches are havens for narcissistic abuse. I am healing from your books and helping others to heal.

Thank you for your life saving ministry!


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How do you leave with no money? You all make it sound like ,,,, no big deal

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You have to rescue yourself! Go Grey and yellow rock with the narc, pretend and act like all is ok. All the while, you.... Secretly get a storage unit and slowly over many months put your stuff in storage ,replace with old things you don't want or Goodwill items. And Secretly open your own bank account in only your name save every penny you can, give yourself a count down date your miving out that works for you! Even if it's two or three yrs away!! It is possible! It's better then staying another 8/10 years!

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'Churches are havens for narcissistic abuse'. I'm sure there are many narcissists in many churches but not all churches are 'havens' for them where they can freely get unobstructed supply. The church I attend is a haven for the abused (in every way) to be safe, loved, edified and healed. We live in a sin sick world and need to be on our knees in prayer. Thank you Dr Clarke for the exposure to narcissism and all the good work you do.

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